A Kielbasa for the Lady?
i think i may have mentioned before that tony and i have been working out. partly because we’re going to florida in the very, very near future (we leave tomorrow evening) and mostly because the possibility of turning into lard-asses looms very large. i’ve never been the obsessed work out type, and i mostly rely on guilt trips and nagging
a la tony to keep me grounded firmly on the treadmill. basically i dread the idea of having to go (fighting for a parking space, sweating, etc), but once i get there, i’m glad i’ve done it. i might not be able to lift my arms above my head the next day, and now have a raging case of athlete’s foot, but by God, i’m excercising.
the funny thing is, we go to the campus rec center to work out. if anyone is still a little confused about the title of this blog, two words: sausage festival. i know, i know. what a surprise that the weight room area in a university gym is dripping with maleness. the basic area set up merely perpetuates this atmosphere. you walk along a long hallway which has large glass windows where you can observe the dominate and sub-dominate males displaying their muscular prowess. so in a way, it’s like viewing the gorillas at the zoo, except these guys aren’t flinging poo.
one of the best things about this area though, and one of the main reasons i work out here (besides the views…), is the air conditioning. the cooled smell of foot and stale sweat smacks you in the nostrils as soon as you pry the door open. ahhhh. to left, muscley flexers on the free weights, to the right the “girly” machines like the stair steppers, butt buster (yes that’s its name, i’m not making that up), and the treadmills. i refuse to use the butt buster on mere principle, thank you very much.
being of the non-sausage variety, i run the treadmill, do steps and warily make my way over to manville. one of my favorites is the leg press. i can press about 180 lbs now; so that’s four 45s on the bar. when i do my “i’m a married female, don’t look at me” walk over to the machine, i always keep an eye on how many weights are already there, just in case i have to take 500 lbs off before i can begin. one of my proudest moments was walking over when this guy had just got up from doing his sets (180 lbs). he asked if i needed help taking off the weight. i looked him straight in the eye and smiled. “nope.”
aside from the visual benefits, i do have a few complaints . one, is the fratty girls that go there to “work out”. and i use this term loosely because it’s really hard to exercise in a thong and shorts that are rolled down past your belly button. some girls think they’re in a rap video (it’s gettin’ hot in here, so take off all your clothes) rather than a gym. and because it is such a sausage festival, it is a great place to see and be seen; so it’s not that i don’t understand their motives, but the rest of us chicks that are there in high school track shirts and cut off sweat pants would like a break.
two, can you say anorexia? i’ve lost count of all the twigs i see working out. it’s scary how skinny some of the girls are. i’m talking 0% body fat and taking to the treadmill like they’re chasing down a krispy kreme truck. thankfully, i know you were so worried, i do not fall into that catagory. i love food, but not enough to visit with it twice, if you know what i mean. and i’ve already established my loathing for excercise, so i guess i’m in the clear.
i’m hoping that all my hard work has paid off and that while i’m doing the swimsuit shame dance on the beach (discreetly pulling off my shorts and shirt, baring my incandescent glowing skin to the world), that i’ll only have to suck it in a little less than before.
and if that doesn’t make you feel better, this will. every time i think of it, i laugh.
my sister and i went to get a facial at a spa last weekend. practically asleep after an hour of intensive facial cleansing and hand/neck massaging, jody (the girl cleaning me) puts a spotlight on my face. she hmmms and pokes around a little then asks in a spa-soothing voice, “dawn, have you ever considered a lip-wax?”
needless to say, i’ve retired the goatee i was hard at work on…
have an awesome week and we’ll chat more when i return.