Job Fare 2003

i apologize.
there’s been
a black hole in my head
and heart of late.

i can’t get over
it.
i can’t get rid of
it.
i can’t hold it under the water until
it
stops breathing.

i want to go but it says
wait.
i want to run but it says
crawl.

so
i
crawl
and
wait
and
creep
and
keep my hands loose about its neck,
until
its time.

i know poetry month was last month, but it’s either write a poem about how i feel or i can bore you to death with how frustrating it is looking for a job.

but i can do both, if you insist. part of the reason i haven’t updated my blog lately is because i have no spirit for it. any creative energies i have, i’m puking it all up on applications and cover letters. if i have to write one more cover letter, one more teaching philosophy, or one more brief biographical sketch, i think i’m going to scream. that, and i’m getting this new twitch on the right side of my face. is this a good thing? i just noticed it again this evening while mailing off more hapless resumes.

all i would like now is a measley reply back from any one of the bagillion places that i have applied to. bullocks to the slow economy! i dare someone to give me a job! have masters degree, will travel.

so that’s all that’s been keeping me up at night. that and the thought of how close summer vacation is….

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