i painted my toenails friday night. after typing the word “toenails” i realize how uncouth it sounds.

let’s try that again.

i painted my toes friday night.

hmmmm. marginally better, but on with the story.

do you realize how difficult it is for me to reach my feet at seven months pregnant? i was crunched up in my office chair, grasping at the edges of the object of my attention, trying desperately not paint my feet and my chair at the same time. it actually turned out well.

why all the fuss? i was going to wear “cute feet” shoes. you know, the kind that showcases such painting efforts, as well as good loofa attention to my winter weary peds. we were “dressing” for dinner and for once, i didn’t want to feel frumpy going out for a nice meal. mission accomplished.

do you think guys go through the same amount of trouble for such things? doubtful. what do guys do when they want to feel sexy? wear clean underwear?

what do pregnant women do? we focus on the little things because it’s the big things that are mostly out of our control. not that i’m whining, but it’s really hard for me to feel sexy when i’m twenty pounds more than usual and my belly is the first thing people notice, so spending a little more time on my feet is one way to make myself feel better. and the nice thing was, people noticed. i got several compliments that night on my cute feet. giving myself a hernia to paint my toes was well worth the effort in the end.

women in general are in tune to feet and we know the importance of showcasing our own. my sister, before both of her children were born, made sure that she went to get a pedicure before she went to the hospital. she said she didn’t want to put her feet in the stirrups while she was pushing and have everyone see icky feet. so at the birth of her children, she sported a fresh pedicure and red polish.

i’m a desperate woman and these are desperate times. if all of my sex goddess-ness has to be channeled somewhere, then i guess down is as good a place as any.

and for now i will take shallow solace in my sassy feet.

thanks for noticing.